Friday, March 30, 2012

Reflections on Pampering your Muse

Reflections on Pampering your Muse


For me, the act of pampering your muse is the act of self love, self care, and self guidance. When we are pampering our muses, it means we are taking time to take care of ourselves and giving ourselves a much needed break. It may mean we have to slow down at work, say not to over-scheduling our children with one more play-date, or take time to go for a stroll with the family and let the dishes sit for a night.
It may mean curling up with a good book once a month, going to get a cup of coffee with a magazine once a week, or writing in a journal 10 minutes a day.

Saxxy Soul
Saxxy Soul (c)
Caring for yourself will look different for each individual and during different times in your life, and we need to be aware of that. We know when our muse needs pampering when we are cranky, irritable, easily aggravated, and readily annoyed. We know we need “muse” time when we lack energy for life, when we are ready to throw in the towel, or spend hours in front of the TV and do not enjoy the shows we are watching. We know our muse needs pampering when life lacks joy, laughter, music, song, and dance. When the little things no longer bring a smile to our lips and hope to our hearts, it is time to pamper your muse and do whatever it takes to bring back that feeling that life is too short and we must live it gusto.

Poema Lirico
Poema Lirico (c)
Paulo Coelho said, “Life can be too short or too long, depending on how we are living it.” And he is so right. If we are feeling that life is too long, we need to get out and get an ice cream cone, blow bubbles with the grandkids, take a walk on beach, or visit an old friend. We need to do whatever lifts us up and brings us joy and makes us feel like life is for cherishing the little moments.
Here is to your muse, may she be happy, fulfilled, and ready to take on the challenges that life has to offer.
Con un pan y cafecito,
Seguimos adelante
Zulmara Maria

Breath in strong energy with sparks of light!!
Respiren la buena energía con chispas de luz..!

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Mia Ramon an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Pampering Foods

Pampering Foods

Spiritual Healer
Spiritual Healer (c)

What foods feeds your muse and help to keep you going?

For me, it is chocolate…chocolate and more chocolate…ice cream, truffles, See's Candy…if it is chocolate, my muse is happy…

I also love fruits and nuts --so nice to live in SoCal and have access to so many fruits for so much of the year…I love kiwi, watermelon, melons, strawberries, plums, peaches. Etx…I have never met a fruit I did not love…Also, love nuts…walnuts, cashews, almonds….are my favs...

Sophia 1
Sophia I
Bread and cheese are my staples…to balance the sugar high…lol…I love a good bread and have made friends with almost all cheeses available…looovvveee pan con queso...

My sinful food is pizza…uuumm, uuuummm, good. Love pizza with chicken especially…BBQ, garlic, and grilled. I also love veggies on my pizza and a personal favorite from my pregnancy days --mushroom/olive pizza.

What is your favorite pampering food? What is your pick me up snack? What feeds your muse

Water…Can't Create without Quenching your Thirst

Water, water, water, water…I find that without water, I have no stamina to keep going. I keep a water bottle on my desk--always--and I drink ice tea, vitamin water, Slenderize, and Gatorade.

I stay away from Soda…but I will do diet coke when the mood strikes me and I stay away from juices…seem to heavy for most writing days.
Hermana Series
Hermana Series (c)

Wine I reserve for those times when I am done with the creative process and ready to chilax with my family, my hubby, my FB friends and other special peeps…in my life.

What do you drink when you are writing…What is your special treat? Are you addicted to coffee…tea…wine??

Con un pan y cafecito, seguimos adelante…

Zulmara Maria

Más vale prevenir que tener que lamentar
Better safe than sorry

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Mia Ramon an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Monday, March 26, 2012

Music and the Muse

Music and the Muse
Music Ecstasy
Music Ecstasy(c)

Music is one of the ways I pamper my inner muse. It is so inspiring to me to listen to some of my favorite artists to set the mood, the tone, the pace of my creativity.

I like melodic music that quiets the mind, when I need to think, figure things out, and rein myself in. When I am in the zone of my inner diva, I love Brazilian Samba….to set a beat, a tone, a pace that is fast, fun, eventful , and filled with happiness. This is for brain storming and setting my vibration. Sometimes, my muse and I just need to get up and dance.

Some of my favs for just getting in the zone and staying in the zone include:

  • In Dis Life by IZ…mellow and non-distracting...
  • Reyli for those soft, sadder love songs that bring back memories and put you in the mood of writing that sadder, deeper feeling…
  • Samba…especially by the Samba schools for those upbeat writing moments
  • Celine Dion…anything by Celine sets a tone and a mood that gets me in the zone.

In Dis Life by IZ these beautifully, melodic songs from Hawaii have a very mellow and non-distracting sound. Played mostly on a ukele and sung in a melodic tone, IZ sets a mood that is both reflective and contemplative. I now own 3 of his CD's, one for each trip to Hawaii. YES!!! he is a gem, just take a listen.

Music Heals the World
Music Heals the World (c)
Reyli is my favorite for those soft, sadder love songs that bring back memories and put you in a reflective of trying to figure out who you are and what you want out of life. He helps you know that life is for feeling, even when the feelings are deep and emotional. He sings in Spanish and Spanish love songs are especially moving to me and get to a place in my soul that is deep and profound.

When I want a female voice, I love Gloria Estefan's Spanish love songs. She sings with a profound, deep sense of love and longing that are perfect for setting the mood for love and heartache and heartbreak.

I also have Roberto Carlos on my playlist for when II need a connection to my Brazilian roots that are deep, powerful and filled with profound feelings of love.


OK, SAMBA sounds are for when I need energy, zip, pizzazz, and a get up and go. Samba is in my soul, having heard it from birth and it moves my spirit, touches my heart, and keeps me going. I have more Samba sounds and more Brazilian songs on my playlists than anything else--I love the upbeat sounds of Samba and it gets into my soul. It moves my muse forward at a fast pace, and helps me to be in the zone and in the moment.
Base Fiddle Goddess
Base Fiddle Goddess

I love how the beat and rhythm just get into my inner essence and get me moving with purpose and abandon, be it writing, drawing, creating, or just being in the world. … I just let the Samba sounds take me wherever I am meant to go.

What music fills your spirit, makes you move, and helps you get into the ZONE of writing…What sounds take you away?

Con un pan y cafecito, seguimos adelante


Para que la cuña apriete, debe de ser del mismo palo.

In order to have a good fit, select the right person for the job

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Mia Ramon an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Friday, March 23, 2012

Interview Your Muse

Interview Your Muse
My lips are Sealed
My Lips are Sealed

Sometimes when we are going through a rough time, personally, professionally, or creatively, it is nice to get in touch with our muse in order to get out of a funk. When the creative juices are not flowing, it is often a sign that the muse needs to pampered or tenemos que cuidar de nosotros mismos, we have to take care of ourselves. Getting you know your muse, also helps you to know what to do when you are ailing. What you need to do to care for yourself. Sometimes the common cold is the cure.

To know my muse is __________
My muse loves ________
What are THREE adjectives that best describe your muse?
1. ____________
You're walking down the street on a beautiful day; you're feeling good, looking good. What theme song is your muse playing in your mind?
What drives your muse? What feeds her passion?
What truly inspires you when you are one with your muse?
Word Association. What comes to mind when your muse sees the following words:
  • DREAM:
Con un pan y cafecito,
seguimos adelante

Quien no se arriesga no pasa la mar.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Chocolate Bate, Bate

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Maria Sanchez an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Is Your Tink in the Pink?

Is Your Tink in the Pink?

When we have one of those incredibly creative days where we are one with out muse, is it just an accident, or have we made it happen by serving and honoring our muse, that inner spirit that sustains our creativity? Can we actually create more of those days of feeling as one with our muse? Could it be that how do we deal with our Pixies, our muses and their idiosyncrasies, those irascible, petulant characters that live with us day and night, makes a difference?

Well, many of my creative friends have very imaginative and inspired ways to pay, honor, and serve their muses.  My personal favorite is to indulge in a mocha hot fudge banana sundae from, of all places, Disneyland.  UUUUMMMM, my muse, after a tough week of work or an especially fruitful day of writing and creating is very pleased when we indulge, even though we try not indulge too often.
Pretty in Pink Catrina - Maria Sanchez
Pretty in Pink
On a more regular basis, I renew and charge up and rev up my muse with a walk on the beach…preferably at water’s edge…what a peaceful way of getting in touch with nature and nurturing the inner spirit simultaneously.  I also love spending time in my hot tub, especially after at the end of the day when the night is cool and the water is hot…no better way to rest, relax, rejuvenate, and replenish.
I have many friends, who go to the spa, take a day off to shop at the mall, get a facial, or go out to a nice dinner.  It does not matter how we feed, honor and serve our muses, it just matters that we do it, because when we don’t take the time to replenish the well, the well runs dry and we are out of balance, out of sorts, and nothing feels right, nothing goes right, nothing seems to matter or have a purpose. 
When you are not caring for your inner muse, your inner muse is not caring for you and you begin to feel it…you begin to know it. For those of us who live with a muse, our moods, our ways of viewing the world, our thought processes are an ever mixing intertwined, inter-tangled, inter-meshed web of constantly creating and constantly feeding the hand that sustains us.

My friends who do not have a muse do not know what I am talking about when I say my muse needs to take a walk, or she needs chocolate, or she needs to go out and play with the kids.  They think it is silly stuff, but when Tinker Bell is your constant companion, you know how cranky she can get if you forget to take time to properly thank her for all of the wonderful hours of inspiration, stimulation, vibration, and encouragement she has given.
To better understand how you love, honor and respect your inner muse, reflect on the following:
  • When you are at your creative best, what are you doing? What are you eating? What exercise are you getting? What kind of time are you taking for yourself? What music is on your playlist? What sights, sounds, smells, and tastes are you gravitating towards?
  • When you are not at your creative best, or feeling out of balance, how are you spending your time? What are you eating? What time are you taking for yourself? What fun are you having in your life?  How are you maintaining balance? What sights, sounds, smells, and tastes are missing?
Understanding how we serve, honor, and love our muse is the first step in living a life of harmony as creative sentient beings. We need to be able to recognize that our muse needs to honored and pampered in order for us to live in harmony with our creative selves.
Hope your Tink is in the Pink today…
Con un pan y cafecito,
Seguimos Adelate
Hay que aprender a perder antes de saber jugar.
One must learn how to lose before learning how to play.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Maria Sanchez an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Monday, March 19, 2012

Honoring and Serving Your Muse

Honoring and Serving Your Muse
Reducir El Estres le hace sentirse mejor...

As creative, sentient beings, we owe much to our muse, that inner voice that inspires us to write, to paint, to draw and to create.  That inner self that calls us to a blank sheet of paper, an empty canvas, a block of wood, or a piece of stone.  That sense of identity that does not allow us to go one day without practicing our craft, which lets us know we are out of balance when we do not honor our craft on a daily regular basis. That inner spirit that lets us know if we are on the right track or not, or steers us into a totally different direction.   It is this muse, this inner friend, internal companion that drives us to have to write, to sing, to draw, to paint, to create, even when we are not feeling well, even when we are not inspired.
Virgen up close
Virgen up close*
Now, don’t get me wrong here, I am not romanticizing the muse.  I don’t feel that muses are by any means inspiring us day and night to be the best we can be at our craft…instead, after talking to many creative sentient beings about their craft, their process for creating, and the pain of producing the just right product, I think our muses are the bane of our existence and well as the source of our inspiration and well being.
I tend to think of my muse as a little bit like Tinker Bell…she has a personality of her own, and can be simultaneously inspiring and stimulating, as well as, bratty, and stubborn, and a know-it-all, At times, my muse can even be, are you ready for this…downright argumentative, belligerent, and quarrelsome.
I have been known to have conversations with my muse along the lines of:

“I like this title.”
“No you don’t, you just think you like it, but in reality, you know you need a better one.”
“NO this one is just fine, stop bugging me.”
“Now you know it’s not right and you’ll eventually have to change it anyway, so just listen to me and change it now.”
“No, I like this title.”
“Fine, be stubborn, you know I’m right, that’s why you have that nagging feeling that something is not right.”


“What are you writing, Miguel would never say that.”
“Yes, he would, he just did, see…”
“Yeah, but that’s wrong…doesn’t sound like him.”
“Ok, miss smarty pants, what does sound like him?”
“I don’t know, he’s your character, you decide.”
“You are not being much help here.”

But, then there are days when I get nothing but Pixie dust from my Tinker Bell and I will write for hours, that seem like minutes and the writing flows effortlessly. Those are the days when I know my muse and I are communicating as one.  It is the sort of day that just happens out of the blue…you wake up and you are best friends with your muse and you write 2,000, 3,000 or even 4,000 words and they are all pretty good and you are left feeling like the moon, the sun and the stars are all lined up to make you a success, that the universe is on your side, and that YES, you have chosen the right profession.
However rare those days for those of us who are creative sentient beings, we live for them, we live to recreate them, we are driven, as if in search of a fountain of eternal happiness or that “fix”, that pixie dust of magic that sustains us and keeps us going.     
So I have to ask, are those great days just an accident, or do we make them happen by serving and honoring our muse? When our muse is pampered, are we rewarded?
Con un pan y cafecito
Seguimos adelante

Más hace una hormiga andando que un buey echado.
An ant on the move does more than a dozing bull.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Maria Sanchez an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Friday, March 16, 2012

Inspiring Your Muse

Preparing for St. Carmen's Day
Preparing for St. Carmen*
Inspiring Your Muse

What inspires your muse to be the creative, sentient being that is by your side and is always ready to give you guidance and succor that you need? What makes a your muse go from mediocre to divine diva? Sometimes it helps to get clarity on what you see as a truly creative person to know and understand what it takes to inspire and know your inner muse?

To me, a truly creative person…

  1. Enjoys the scenery on a detour
  2. Finds treasure in the mundane
  3. Loves the smell of a new box of crayons
  4. Colors outside the lines
  5. Runs with wild abandon
  6. Finds wonder in everyday happenings
  7. Loves a challenge
  8. Has perseverance
  9. Loves with passion
  10. Breaks the rules
  11. Makes the rules
  12. At times, even follows the rules
  13. Has a need to leave a creative legacy
  14. Finds solace in soothing music
  15. Grey Gardens 3
    Grey Gardens
  16. Has never met a piece of chocolate that was not loved!!!

How do you know when you are in the presence of a truly creative being?

Con un pan y cafecito,
Seguimos adelante,

El que parte y comparte, se queda con la mejor parte.
He who divides and shares is left with the best share.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Erica Rodriguez an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Knowing Your Muse

Bird Doodle
Bird Doodle*

Knowing Your Muse
Sometimes it helps to take a few minutes to get to know your muse. What makes her tic, what makes her happy, what makes her laugh out loud, what makes her sad??

Here are a series of prompts to help you get insight into who your muse is and what it takes for her to be pampered.

My Muse would say…
Quick Sketch Part 1
  1. When I need time for myself...
  2. If I could live anywhere…
  3. I really miss...
  4. I never expected...
  5. An unusual day in my life…
  6. For my birthday I'd like...
  7. The worst gift I ever got...
  8. I daydream most about...
  9. I really wish....
  10. Few people realize how much…
  11. I wish I weren't so...
  12. One of my best points is...
  13. One of my most important goals is...
  14. I dream that one day...
  15. My proudest accomplishment…
  16. I feel proud when…
  17. I'm glad I'm alive when…
  18. I forget to enjoy…
  19. My divine self…
  20. I love…

Con un pan y cafecito
Seguimos adelante

No dejes para mañana lo que puedas hacer hoy.
Don’t leave for tomorrow what you can do today.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Erica Rodriguez an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Monday, March 12, 2012

Jumpstarting Your Creativity

Jumpstarting Your Creativity

Niece's mural in progress
Mural in Progress*
Pampering your muse…unleashing your inner diva…nurturing your creative soul…encouraging your artistic spirit…this is how we renew, rejuvenate, and jumpstart our creativity. It is how we take care of ourselves so that we can have the inner strength to do the work that calls us, to heed the call of the heart, to honor the voice within, to find our purpose, and do what we are here to do.
I jumpstart my creativity in many different ways. I take time to go on artist dates—dates that are just me, myself and I--browsing through a books store, going to a museum, going out to lunch, sitting at a coffee shop with my journal, or walking in nature.
Untitled (Memories)
My muse also loves chilaxin with good chocolate and good wine…preferably together. I have to be careful so I don’t look like a beached whale, but I do indulge in good chocolate a few times a week. I have learned to limit myself and not to eat too much…my chocolate of choice are chocolate covered caramel macadamia clusters from Costco…they are to die for. I have 2 with a glass of wine in the evening when I sit down to read blogs, go on facbook, and just chilax with my online buddies—as I am renewing my spirit and rejuvenating my soul. It makes for a wonderfully creative and productive evening…and keeps me centered and what really matters and helps me put first things first.
What do you do to jumpstart your creativity and stay centered?

Con un pan y cafecito,
Seguimos adelante,

No hay peor lucha que la que no se hace.
There’s no worse struggle than one that never begins.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by Erica Rodriguez an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Friday, March 9, 2012

Cherishing the Little Things

Cherishing the Little Things
The Village
The Village*
I have found that a pampered muse is sooo wonderful and keeps me sane, happy, wonderfully creative, and wonderfully engaged…I like that…and I also know when I am not caring for my muse, I feel hungry all the time, agitated easily, and my blood pressure goes up…very interesting…very interesting indeed…
My muse is my guide and my inspiration. My muse has taught me to appreciate life and cherish the little things.
Cherishing…the little things
Falling In Love
Falling in Love*
  1. Wonderful children that make a mama proud
  2. Living by the beach and being able to take beach walks daily
  3. Having a job that pays enough for me to live comfortably
  4. Owning a nice computer that allows me to pursue my creative endeavors
  5. Having lots of artist friends who support and inspire me
  6. Bike rides with my husband
  7. The most gorgeous sunsets on the pacific coast
  8. Two homes that provide shelter for others
  9. Health to still be able to enjoy the little things in life
  10. Traveling…at least twice a year to meet new people, get away from it all, and rejuvenate my inner spirit.

What are the little things that you cherish?
Con un pan y cafecito
Seguimos adelante,

Más vale paso que dure y no trote que canse.
Better a stride that will last than a trot that tires fast. 

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by AnaJuliaDariasFishman an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

A Promise to My Muse

In Vision Peace*

A Promise to My Muse
  • I promise to be so strong that nothing can disturb my commitment to the divine.
  • I promise to enjoy and nurture health, happiness, and prosperity.
  • I promise to recognize all of the special qualities I have within.
  • I promise to look at the sunny side of every thing I engage in and let my optimism work to make my dreams come true. 
  • I promise to be enthusiastic about my small successes.
  • I promise to forget past mistakes and press on toward a greater future.
  • I promise to radiate warmth and self-love.
  • I promise to give time to self-improvement in my personal, professional, and creative growth.
  • I promise to be too wise for worry, too tolerant for anger, and too courageous for fear.
  • I promise to be HAPPY and recognize my deeper YESES!

What do you promise your inner muse?

Con un pan y cafecito,
Seguimos adelante

Todo el rato que está enojado, pierde de estar contento.
All time spent angry is time lost being happy.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by AnaJuliaDariasFishman an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Monday, March 5, 2012

Nuturing Your Inner Muse

Nurturing Your Inner Muse

The Force of Love
The Force of Love*
Last month I wrote about journaling as a way of engaging in personal, creative, and professional growth. This month, my focus will be on pampering your muse to allow your creativity to flow to new heights. Our muses are rooted in who we are and what we hope to accomplish in our lives. Our muses soar when we care for them and give them wings to soar.

I am constantly nurturing my inner muse and pampering her to be the best creative me I can be. Nurturing our muse means we are taking time for ourselves and taking care for ourselves. It means living a life of balance and creating time to just care for an nurture who we are, so we can be present and open to the possibilities the divine has to offer us. Here are 10 ways I nurture my inner muse:

Aire Y Tierra
Aire y Tierra*

  1. Eating authentic ethnic foods
  2. Walking on the beach, in the woods, anywhere in nature
  3. Drinking a fine wine with some wonderful chocolate
  4. Dancing when no one is watching
  5. Writing in my journal
  6. Taking time to go see a good movie
  7. Taking an elder to lunch
  8. Listening to inspirational music, speeches, and talks
  9. Expressing my feelings in writing, drawing, singing, dancing, exercising
  10. Living a life true to myself

When my muse is especially silent, I know I need to get myself to the place where she will not be silent anymore. At those times, I have my list of wishes to help me get focused.

1. I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, true to my inner me.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.  
3. I wish I had the courage to say NO more often.
4. I wish I recognized my deeper YES.
5. I wish that my muse was in a better mood.

I am in constant gratitude to my muse for bringing me back on track and keeping me focused on me and focused on who I wish to be. She is my divine guidance that keeps me rooted and gives me wings.

How do you nurture your muse?
Con un pan y cafecito,
Seguimos adelante,

Una onza de alegría vale más de oro.
An once of happiness is worth more than a pound of gold.

*Artowrk for this blog was graciously provided by AnaJuliaDariasFishman an artist on Art by Latina Artists

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Finding Inspiration

Finding Inspiration

My final blog on the journaling journey is finding the inspiration to journal or to get on a journaling journey. It is no easy task to find the inspiration to get to the written page day in and day out, because it has to come from a deeper yes. I find I do my most journaling when I am in need of figuring out my life, when I am in pain, when I am trying to manifest something into my life, or trying to understand what is going on. I also take cues from my body. To me there is no cure for the common cold, because the common cold is often the cure for what ails us, for it hits us when we are not eating right, not sleeping well, and not exercising, that is when our immune system says, slow down…and if we do not listen, we are down for the count.

And, I rarely get sick, so when I do, I take time to reflect on what is going on and I ask myself, what is ailing me, where is my pressure coming from, what stress do I feel in my life, and I turn to the written page for slowing down, reflecting, and healing.

I also find the inspiration when things are gong well. When life is aligned and all is in order, I find I feel good about who I am and what I am doing and I welcome a few moments in the morning to jot down my gratitudes and get in touch with the inner me, the inner guidance that is directing my life in such a positive direction.

To me, finding the inspiration comes from within. If you are in transition, having a hard time, wanting a change but not sure how to deal with it, that drive from within is what will inspire you to get on a journaling journey. Once on the journey, if it is for you, you will stick with it. It is like meditation, everyone says it is good for us, but many who try it don’t see the value. With a journaling journey, you have to find what works for you…a gratitude journal once a week may be enough. A quotes journal for those inspiring quips and quotes to review when you are down, may be just what the doctor ordered. An affirmations page that you read every morning to yourself, but do not need to write are great, or a place to post some interesting notes on your phone during your morning or evening commute, maybe all you need.

I would say if you are reading this, it is because some how the topic resonated with you and showed up. It could be that you were looking for guidance on how to handle a difficult situation, how to take your business to the next level, how to find your purpose in life or how to better define your business. You can ask many questions and the blank page can provide various answers.

My final comment is that there is no failure in journaling. Even if you only finish half a journal, that maybe all your soul needed for you to heal and to feel good about whatever ailed you or all you needed for aspiration or inspiration. Pues, asi es la vida and whatever you do, feel good about the journaling journey you are on.

Con un pan y cafecito
Seguimos, adelante

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Scrapping: A Special Kind of Journaling

Scrapping: A Special Kind of Journaling

When I have had or have needed reflective time, I have turned to scrapping as a way of journaling. I say this because scrapping takes time, dedication, special tools, and more time. It is time intensive to scrap and I have done it only when I know I need to slow down and reflect on who I am, where I am going, how I am doing, and am I staying true to myself.
On Our Wedding Day 33 Years Ago
My scrapbooks are elaborate and themed. Themed within the area where I need to heal, need to learn, need to ask questions, need to resolve issues.

When I hit my 25th Wedding Anniversary, I scrapped and scrapped and scrapped and scrapped. It was in a tumultuous time in my marriage, we were renewing our vows, but I was uncertain if this was the relationship that I wanted to be in, I was unsure if I wanted to affirm this life I had been living for the past 25 years, so I went inside and I went to scrapping.

I scrapped our first 25 years together, I scrapped all the brides in the family, I scrapped 3 books on my childhood for each of my children, I scrapped our 2nd honeymoon…and I felt affirmed. It took a lot of time, effort and energy, but it was one of the most healing journeys I have been on and it shed so many lights for me for where I had been and where I was going.

I was truly at a crossroads in my life and I needed help in finding direction. We did renew our vows and low and behold, today we are celebrating our 33rd wedding anniversary and I feel as committed as ever to this life that I have affirmed over and over again, in many different ways.

So scrapping may take too much time, but what it allowed me to do was bask in the positive energy of the past, the energy captured in pictures of vacations, family gatherings, love, and the good times we spent loving and supporting one another.

To my wonderfully understanding husband of 33 years, thanks for the memories…
And, 25 years later!!!
Con un pan y cafecito

Seguimos adelante,
So young and so in love!!!

Friday, February 24, 2012

Writing Through Your Grief

Writing through your grief

Grief, when it hits us, it can be all encompassing and overpowering. We are overwhelmed with the power of the emotions, the feelings, the devastation and the loss…and there is no way anyone can know or pretend to know how we feel. The feelings run deep and we do not always know how to handle them, but we do know we need to…somehow we need to find it in our selves to get up, get dressed, and put one foot in front of the other. And, it is not easy…as a writer, I have found that writing through my grief allowed me to reach a sense of peace, a sense of inner tranquility that was robbed from me the day my mom passed away and I was left as a motherless daughter. I was seeking out serenity and that is when I discovered the real power of journaling. For the first year, journaling was my connection to my mom and I needed that. I felt a connection that was so powerful, it allowed me to grieve and heal and be in the moment every day. 
At this time in my life, I needed a journaling ritual…I would put on my mom’s favorite CD , light one of the many candles she had in her house, and write a letter to her everyday. In my letter, I recounted that dreaded phone call and discovering that she had passed away, I recounted how much I missed her presence in my life, and I told her all the things I wanted to tell her…and had or did not have a chance to…and I told her about my days…what I was doing, how her grandkids were doing, how much we all missed us and how she had affected all of our lives.

The experience was not easy. At times I would cry rivers and not be able to write, at other times, I would be so angry…I just had to get my anger out…at other times, I would feel a profound sadness at my loss…the emotions were real, they were deep, and they were hard, but I kept at it, because no matter what I wrote, afterwards, I always felt a sense of piece and the knot in the pit of my stomach would dissolve a little bit more…you know the one, where you wake up everyday and it hits you, “Something is not right in my world”…and then it hits you again, I am a motherless daughter…and then you feel it in the pit of your stomach…as you try to start your day..and pretend that everything is normal…even though it is not.
To me a grief journal is the most powerful journal we can write…it keeps us focused, it keeps us centered and it allows us to connect with a loved one in a way that is deep, profound, and leaves nothing unsaid.
My mom is now my constant companion. I no longer write everyday to her, but I think of her daily and miss her dearly…
Cuidate…mis amigas…